dreams
by allechant
Summary: because it is only in dreams that he can love her without worrying about the repercussions. Rated M for explicit adult themes. LenKu.
1. Chapter 1

When the doorbell rang at ten in the morning, Len suddenly got a very bad feeling in his gut. He didn't know why, he just knew that his life was about to undergo a very drastic change.

And when the door opened to reveal a grinning girl with bright green eyes and a huge duffel bag slung over her shoulder, he knew that his gut was right. He squashed the instinctive urge to slam the door shut. "What are you doing here, Miku?" he asked instead, voice flat.

People didn't call him stoic for nothing. He knew the kind of reputation he had amongst the university students he helped to teach. He was also perfectly aware that most of the female students were only there because of the hot teaching assistant. But Len prided himself on his rationality and his ability to keep calm, and no one, not even Hatsune Miku, was going to change that. Though he had to admit that the teal haired girl often tested his patience.

"Well, I'm sure it's not surprising to you, but my landlord kicked me out!" Miku chirped, so carefree that he had to wonder if she had somehow planned to be forcefully evicted from her apartment. She seemed way too calm about this. "Since I'm three months behind on rent. I tried to convince him that I would pay up the next time my money came in, but apparently he didn't believe me after the fifth time I said that, so here I am, looking for a new place to stay!"

He stared at her for ten whole seconds before saying anything. She continued to beam at him, either genuinely oblivious to his disbelief, or just pretending to be unaware. He would think the latter. "So, instead of a hotel or anywhere else, you decided to come here," he finally found the words to respond. It was way too early in the morning for this.

Miku nodded enthusiastically. "I figured you were my best shot!" she giggled, doing a little twirl on his doorstep. His gaze landed on her short navy miniskirt and her low-cut, ruffled white tank top, and he immediately knew that she had chosen this outfit for a reason.

"And what makes you think I'm going to just let you waltz into my apartment and stay here for free?" he deadpanned, tempted to close the door and go back to sleep already. He had stayed out late last night, attending some compulsory post-conference party with the rest of the young faculty, and he was exhausted. He hated parties, but sometimes, there was no way he could get out of attending one. Last night had been one of those rare nights.

Her smile faltered, just a tiny bit. "You're not going to take me in?" she asked, voice filled with betrayal. He was unmoved, all too aware that this was just an act. Miku saw his lack of reaction and exhaled, straightening, the pout disappearing from her face. "Well, if that's the case…I guess I should just go and ask _Rei_ then. I'm sure he'll be much nicer to me than you are," she turned around, duffel bag still over her shoulder, and prepared to walk away from his door.

His hand shot out, grabbing her elbow before she could leave. "No, you can stay here," the words tumbled out before he even knew what he was saying. It was unfair. _She_ was being unfair, given what she knew about him and how he treated her. She had always known that she was special, that he treated her unlike other girls, and casually dropping Rei's name like that would definitely make him react. Rei was a mutual friend of theirs, and he was a good friend at that, but everyone knew that when it came to Miku, Len was…different.

Rei was decent, and he'd never do anything to Miku, but Len just felt uncomfortable about letting her stay with any other guy. Miku turned back towards him, a dazzling smile on her face. She was about to say something when he interjected. "But don't you dare try anything funny – and you better move out once your pay comes in," he warned her, voice flat again.

She nodded agreeably, so he stood aside and allowed her in, pointing the way towards his guest room. It was vacant now anyway, so he might as well take her in. It was only since she had nowhere else to go, and he didn't trust her not to get into any trouble while outside.

Her long teal hair bounced with every step she took, the hem of her skirt fluttering as she swung her hips from side to side, gazing around his tidy apartment. He followed closely, his keen eyes taking note of everywhere she looked, reminding himself to check his items daily so that nothing went missing from under his nose. Miku never managed to kick her habit of stealing things, no matter how many years it had been, so he always had to be careful around her.

"Thanks, Len. You're the best!" she chirruped when she reached the guest room, fluttering her fingers at him before she closed the door in his face. Len exhaled through his nose, shaking his head. The bad feeling in his gut was still there, and he wondered miserably what else lay in store for him. He suspected that this was only the beginning of his troubles.

* * *

Kagamine Len and Hatsune Miku were childhood friends – though admittedly, _friends_ might be a bit of a stretch. It was more accurate to say that Len tolerated her. They used to live in the same neighbourhood, and in fact they went to the same school while growing up.

They separated when they entered university and Miku went to some art college far away. But when she graduated, she came back here, and now she lived free and easy, earning money through freelance work and commissions. She didn't exactly have a steady income, so she often supplemented her pay through petty theft, a habit she had picked up since their early days. Her father was a criminal who went in and out of jail, often for crimes such as robbery and theft, so it was easy to see where Miku had learnt her bad habits.

Honestly, Len sometimes wondered why he even put up with her. He was the complete, total opposite of Miku, with a moral compass straighter than a ruler and a rigid belief that one could succeed only if they controlled their emotions. Miku was a loose cannon, often doing things on impulse, following whatever her dreams and feelings told her to do, while Len would weigh all things rationally before finally making a decision about how to proceed.

She called him boring because of that, but he always retorted, saying that he'd rather be a bore than to get by through seducing the opposite gender and running off with their money. She only rolled her eyes, entirely unoffended – it took a great deal to annoy Miku. She was so easy-going, so carefree that it _irritated_ him. And now she was staying in his apartment.

He twirled his pen around his fingers, unable to read past the current page. He had been stuck on this passage for the last ten minutes, his mind always fixed on her. Last night, she left his house, and she hadn't been back since. He didn't want to admit it, but he was very worried about her. Why, he didn't know, since he was aware that Miku could look after herself. But nervousness made his teeth clench and his hands restless, and he was unable to sit still.

When the door suddenly opened, announcing her return, he shot out of his study into the living room, his blue eyes glaring in her direction. "Where did you go?" he asked at once, the words extremely pointed. "Do you think this is some kind of _hotel_ , where you can just walk in and out as you please?" he continued before she had a chance to answer. Miku blinked.

"I went to meet a friend who was in town!" she explained, taking off her heels and tossing them in a corner. Len narrowed his eyes, some part of his mind noting that she looked _extremely_ pretty right now – not that she wasn't always attractive, but he would never say that to her, knowing it would just inflate her already enlarged ego. "And to answer the other half of what you said…well, you're not my parent, so it's not like you care about where I go, right?" she reasoned, shaking out her wavy hair, voice tired but eyes still glowing a vibrant green.

He hesitated. That was true. He wasn't supposed to care. He was just allowing her to stay in his apartment since she had nowhere else to go, and he didn't want her to get lodging from anyone else because he didn't trust _her_ to keep her hands to herself. But the unease in his heart simply wouldn't settle. "What did you buy?" he finally asked, to defuse the tension.

Miku glanced at the shopping bag she had left on the floor. "Oh, this?" her eyes crinkled up in joy, good humour evident in her expression. "Now that's a secret, so I'd rather not tell you," she winked, her trademark wink which had always been able to do strange things to his insides. He ignored the feeling because it meant nothing. Instead, he narrowed his eyes again.

"You're living in _my_ house," he started, "so I think I have a right to at least know what you're bringing in here just in case it happens to be something which could get us both in trouble." He glared again at the plain brown paper bag. It seemed small and completely ordinary, but he had dealt with Miku enough times to know that appearances were never just what they seemed with her. The girl just giggled again, turning away from him and picking up the bag.

"Aw, you need to stop being so suspicious, Len," she tutted, walking out from the hallway and dropping her small purse on the couch. She had only been here for a week but she was already treating his apartment like her own house. He didn't know whether he ought to tell her to respect his boundaries, but he finally decided against it – she wouldn't listen anyway. "But just to ease your worries, I can safely assure you there's nothing dangerous in here – well, it's not dangerous in the conventional sense, anyway," her green eyes gleamed with mischief.

He wanted to interrogate her further at that, because danger in _any_ sense at all was not something he wished to deal with. But before he could say a word, she suddenly reached up on her tiptoes and pressed a light kiss to his cheek, then ran off before he could react, going to the guest room and locking herself inside. It took a while before he could think again.

Hatsune Miku was going to be the death of him. It had only been a week, but he was already losing his mind. He hoped she would move out as soon as possible, but at the same time, part of him wished that she would never leave. He refused to acknowledge that part of himself.

* * *

It had been a shitty week. Len had already decided that the first thing he was going to do when he got home was to throw off his shoes, slump onto the couch, and lose his mind in some numbing, brainless television. If the teal haired devil in his house hadn't cleared out the ice cream he kept in the fridge, he was going to finish off the entire tub as well.

He sure as hell deserved it. First, his thesis paper needed to be restructured entirely, so that was a few more weeks of late-night research and studies. Then he still had to grade the papers of the entire class since the professor was away on some compulsory work conference, meaning _he_ would have to look through fifty exam papers and grade all of them by hand. He had recently started marking the papers and he could already feel the beginnings of a migraine.

Sometimes he wondered if choosing to go down the academic route was the right thing to do. He knew what he was interested in – research, especially in communications and society, since the idea of studying people and how they worked had always been fascinating to him. And he actually liked reading papers and doing research, so that wasn't the hard part. No, the irritating part was that being a post-graduate student meant he was attached to one of the professors in university, and that also meant being a teaching assistant. Now _that_ part sucked.

He comforted himself with the fact that his pay was good, at least decent enough to let him afford this entire apartment without any difficulty. It sure was a lot more than he could say for the teal haired girl mooching off him. Speaking of that girl…he exhaled, able to hear the sounds of someone laughing as they bounced on a mattress. He was pretty sure the sounds were coming from his room, as if he wasn't already having one of the worst days of his life so far.

Len marched over to his room, pulling the door open with his free hand, the other one holding on to the second bag of groceries he had picked up at the supermarket, after the first bag he paid for was stolen while he was searching for loose change in his pockets. He was intending to give Miku a piece of his mind, but the words died on his tongue.

He didn't know what he had been expecting, but it definitely wasn't this. Miku fell onto his bed, breathless, the thin straps of her short, silky black nightie falling down her milky arms, exposing smooth, fair skin. His eyes ran up the length of her arms to her neck, to her shoulders, and he wondered if it was fair that he couldn't spot a single blemish. Her round, soft breasts were barely hidden underneath the nightie, which was so short that it hardly seemed to be doing anything for her. "What are you doing?" were the first words out of his mouth.

It was a miracle his words didn't come out sounding half-strangled. Miku brushed some of her hair out of her eyes, the long teal waves flowing down her back, looking so soft, so very temptingly touchable. She was all soft curves and long legs, with a smile which could break so many hearts. He had always known she was beautiful, that she could sway men so easily that it all seemed laughably pathetic, but there was something genuine in her green eyes today…or was that just wishful thinking?

"You asked me last week what I bought, remember?" she shrugged, kneeling on his bed, the silky nightie fluttering as she moved. He tried not to look at her, too distracted by the sight of her exposed skin and her breasts, but in the process, he caught sight of the lacy black panties she was wearing, and he almost got a coronary. "I told you it wasn't dangerous. And today I decided to prove to you that I wasn't lying," she added, a catlike grin on her face.

He wanted to whimper, but he managed to hold it in. People knew him as stoic and he was vaguely aware that most of the other Masters students were under the impression that he was asexual, but contrary to popular belief, Len did have some fantasies of his own. And he was ashamed to admit that more than one of those fantasies had featured Miku in some very, _very_ questionable acts. He was beginning to wonder if this episode was just a dream too.

So, this was what she meant by not dangerous in the conventional sense. Because it sure as hell was dangerous for his libido. "Get out of my room," his voice didn't break, which he was proud of, because honestly, if she was in here for another minute he might lose his mind.

Miku pouted, getting off the bed. His throat was dry. She was all perfection and loveliness, a flawless face with a cunning mind – her personality was so flawed but that made her all the more human, reachable, touchable, _present_. She approached him and he could see the slight curve of her cleavage, then she reached out, grabbing his hands. It was only then that he realised he had dropped his grocery bag on the floor. "You know you don't want me to leave."

He knew she was right, but he wasn't going to admit it. There were so many things about him which Miku was right about, but he'd never admit anything to her. Like the fact that he was hopelessly in love with her? Not something he would _ever_ say – but somehow, she just seemed to know. She had to, because why else would she come to his house when she was kicked out of hers? Why else would she mention Rei, knowing how that would make him react?

But he didn't want her to know all this. "You don't know what I'm thinking, so don't pretend you do," his voice did crack a little now, but he wasn't really at the point where he could care anymore. Her hands were so soft. And she was still standing there in that erotic little dress, gazing up at him with practiced innocence – a gaze he was certain had been rehearsed and refined until it reached perfection, but he was affected by her anyway. "You really need to leave."

"But you'd miss me," she pouted, suddenly letting go of his hands. He didn't know whether to feel relieved or disappointed that she had stopped touching him. He reminded himself that he couldn't just lose his rationality like that – this wouldn't be good for him. And he was pretty sure Miku was doing this for some reason, not because she was attracted to him… "I mean, why are you being so difficult? You're hot. I'm hot. We should be hot together."

Maybe she was attracted to him then, just a little. He couldn't really tell. He didn't say a word, his logical thought fast disappearing. It had been too long. And even during those other times, with those other girls, they had never really been the girl he wanted. The one he _did_ want was here right now, in his room, giving him the sweetest smile he'd ever seen – though he knew it probably wasn't real, he could still feel his heart pounding in his chest.

"And you know what else I have? I bought handcuffs," she giggled, reaching around and brandishing a pair of soft, furry handcuffs – the kind of thing you'd probably find in a shady sex shop. He spluttered, taking a step back – this was becoming too much for him. It really had to stop before it got out of hand and they did something they'd regret. And he knew that if he thought any longer about the handcuffs, he was going to imagine something that he really shouldn't be imagining, especially not with Miku in this state in front of him.

"Are you drunk? Did you drink?" he asked, clutching at straws. Anything to get her out of his room, and give him a solid excuse to throw her out. He was afraid that if there was no real reason, he would just give in, because he was dangerously close to losing his rationality. He miserably thought about how he'd always been so proud of his logic, but here he was, so close to making the worst mistake of his life. Because sleeping with Miku would definitely be a mistake. She was attractive, no doubt about that, but what was he besides one more person for her to conquer? He didn't want to be just another score in her records.

"Maybe just a little," she admitted, giggling again, "but not enough to make me lose sense of myself. Too bad for you, Len," she added, winking at him. That damned wink. This time, he didn't manage to hide the half-choke, half-wheeze he let out, and she smiled, her large eyes lit with fiery mischief. Once again, she approached him, and this time she reached out to touch his cheek, her hands so soft and warm against his skin. She smelled like the perfume he had been smelling all over his apartment lately, the distinct scent of rosewater and lilies – it was her scent, _Miku's_ scent. He was getting drunk on her perfume, and he couldn't really think anymore, so he thought _to hell with it_ and grabbed her face, pressing his lips to hers.

She didn't taste like honey, the way he had envisioned in past dreams and fantasies, when he woke up in his bed still gasping, his sheets drenched with sweat and desire. Her lips were soft and warm, just like the rest of her, and so tender. He couldn't breathe, and he couldn't think – all he knew was that he was touching her, and she was touching him, and this was probably the worst mistake he could ever commit, but then why didn't it feel like a mistake?

Her hands were moving up and down his back, slipping underneath the hem of his shirt. He didn't move to stop her, not even when her deft fingers began to unbutton his top, each white button sliding through its hole. He didn't move to stop her when the shirt was undone – he just lifted his arms, allowing her to take it off him, and there he was, bare skin exposed to her. Her nails raked gently over his flat stomach, and he hissed into her soft mouth.

It was Miku who pulled away first, breathing heavily, something almost like lust in her eyes – but did she really want him, or was there some other reason why she was doing this? He wanted to care more about this, but he couldn't really bring himself to. He wanted her, but at the same time he was terrified, and he wasn't sure about what he was doing. "I promise this isn't a game," she told him, and her voice was so sincere that for once, he trusted her, and so he leant down towards her again, another kiss, raw and searching. She sighed into his mouth as his hands dropped down onto her hips, the silky nightie a smooth, tempting barrier between his skin and hers.

There was a _click_ sound, and his eyes flew open as he felt soft fur against his wrists – he looked down, and saw that Miku had locked his wrists together with the handcuffs, the link behind her back. He blinked a few times, then glared at her, not liking where this was going. Miku giggled again. "And I promise to take turns," she whispered. He gritted his teeth.

"This is not funny. What the _hell_ are you –" his words were cut off as she knelt down, and he watched her, what he wanted to say dying on his tongue, Miku gazing innocently at him the whole time as she crouched lower and lower, that practiced look capturing his attention. He didn't know how to feel when she crawled out from beneath his locked arms, rising up and brushing imaginary lint off her nightie. "Where are you going? What are you doing? _Miku_!"

She had known what he would have thought when she knelt down. It was all beginning to feel like some horrible prank. "I'm just waiting for the fun things to begin," she answered, pushing some of her teal hair behind her back. He fumed, unable to do anything else.

"Get this stupid thing off me," he ordered, holding out his chained arms. She just shook her head merrily, taking another step towards him and kissing him again, this time a more passionate kiss, less reserved than the previous times. He lost his thoughts again, backing her towards the bed until she fell over, taking him with her, and then it was just the two of them lost in their own world, her quietly calling his name when his teeth grazed her skin, her earlobe, her sensitive neck. She yelped when he gently bit her, and her moans and her shudders were almost enough to drive him insane – _almost_ , but not really. Because he was Kagamine Len, and no matter what, he was always going to retain an element of sanity.

If he was going to just forget about all his rules and reasons why he wasn't supposed to be doing this with Miku, then at the very least he would retain his demeanour, even with her. He wouldn't allow her the pleasure of hearing him beg, of hearing any sign of weakness. It was what she wanted, but he wouldn't give it to her. If they were going to do anything, then it would be on his terms. Her slender arms were wrapped around his neck and his name fell from her lips, and he had to breathe, memorising the taste and feel of her mouth.

Her ankle was looped around his, and she lazily dragged her foot up and down his calf. The slow sensation was enough to make him shudder, but he bit his lip, determined not to make a sound. She glanced at him with heavy-lidded eyes, her lips slightly swollen from his kisses. She had never looked more alluring, and that was a difficult feat, because if Len had to be absolutely honest, he thought Miku was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. That was probably the reason why she seemed so able to sway men into doing whatever she wanted.

He never intended to be one of those men, but he was afraid he might be after today, after this. "Why are you doing this to me?" he panted, meeting her gaze, forcing her to look into his eyes. The green almost glowed. "So that you could live here a while longer for free?"

She pouted. "I wouldn't need to have sex just for that," she pointed out. "There are other ways for me to continue staying here. Just saying I'll ask some other guy for lodging would be good enough," she shrugged, and unfortunately, both of them knew she was right.

But he couldn't think of any other reason. While he was still struggling for words, Miku abruptly reached up and flipped them over, and then she was the one straddling his hips while he lay beneath her, eyes wide. Her hands slid down his torso, towards his belt, and suddenly he stiffened as he realised what she was about to do. "I think you're very eager to see me," she whispered, undoing his pants. He wanted to push her off somehow, but then she had her hand around him and his mind blanked out when her hand _moved_.

His breaths were shallow. The only thing on his mind from the very moment she touched him was how good it felt – how good her hand felt on him, her whispered words stroking his skin. When her thumb ran gently over the tip, he had to reach up to his face and bite down on his palm to prevent himself from groaning. "But I don't want you to keep quiet," Miku protested, her free hand tugging at his. "That's not fun, it's not enjoyable," she added, and though he was stronger than her, he acquiesced to her wishes, eyes narrowing as he tried his best to stay conscious. She felt so good. Suddenly her other hand was there, and he had to close his eyes, letting out a moan. It was humiliating, but he couldn't care anymore.

When she gently squeezed and leant down to kiss him on the lips, he groaned loudly into her mouth, shudders running down his spine. He was blinded for a second, and when his vision cleared, Miku was climbing off him. "Where are you going?" he asked, his voice a little strange, almost weak. She glanced back at him and smiled, waving one of her hands. It was covered in sticky whiteness, and he had to look away, feeling almost embarrassed.

She entered his bathroom, and he could hear the sound of water running in the sink. Len wondered if it was all over just like that, and though he knew he ought to be relieved that nothing more had happened, most of him was very disappointed by the thought that he'd now spend the rest of his night alone…especially after _that_. He wasn't even fully satisfied, and this didn't make him feel any better. His chest was heaving. After a while, he got up from the bed and went to the bathroom, growing more and more concerned that she'd leave.

"Oh, I'm just washing my hands," she looked up and smiled at him in the mirror, and she was so beautiful, her face so tender, her lips a rosy shade of pink. He swallowed. His hands were still bound by the handcuffs, which was beginning to really irk him because they were hindering his movements. "You have to be more patient, Len! I get tired easily, you know."

"Don't mess around with me," he snapped, eyes narrowing. She rolled her own eyes, but otherwise ignored him. "Did that count as a turn?" he added hopefully, remembering her promise that they would take turns with the handcuffs. Miku spun around to face him and shook her head, placing her hands on his chest and walking them back out to his bedroom. They were lying on the bed again, still breathless, while Len was still extremely frustrated.

"You'll know what a turn is," she promised playfully, teasing him with her words. Her hands moved towards the handcuffs, and he suddenly felt one of his wrists become free of the fur – he rotated his freed wrist experimentally, wondering what she had in mind, and just as quickly he heard that _click_ sound again, not just once, but twice this time. He looked up and realised that both of his wrists were now chained to his bedposts, and he let out an annoyed groan.

It was only after she locked him to the bed that he realised he desperately wanted to touch her. He had yet to really touch her, yet to feel her soft skin against his fingertips. He badly wanted to know how her skin would feel beneath that silky nightie, and he wanted to hold on to her waist and flip them over so that he could be on top of her, and he could make her moan his name all night in that breathy voice of hers until she came undone around him, begging him for more, begging him for mercy, begging him to stop. He _wanted_ to hear her beg, this strong, capricious girl with so much spirit in her eyes. He wanted to make her his.

As though she could sense his desperate desire, she let her hands linger playfully on the hem of her nightie, lifting it slowly to reveal smooth, bare skin, a flat stomach, and that narrow, shapely waist, so beautiful and so perfect that she seemed unreal. His fingers twitched, but he was chained to the bed and he couldn't move. She tossed the nightie over her head onto the floor, and he swallowed – she wasn't wearing a bra, and her breasts were now pretty much in his face, so soft, so round. "I've been a bad girl, Len," she murmured sensuously, eyes filled with mischief. "Don't you think I deserve to be punished?"

He almost choked. "But I'm the one locked up here," he answered, hoping that she would change her mind about handcuffing him. She giggled and placed a finger against his lips, and he swallowed, the frustration almost boiling over by this point. It was so unfair. He was kind enough to let her stay in his apartment, and the next thing he knew she was barging into his room and demanding sex as though he was some kind of _toy_. Why was she like this? How could she treat him this way? "Why are you so selfish?" he asked, unable to help himself.

She just sighed. He could feel her lace panties, which she was still wearing, against his bare stomach. "You know you like it," was all she said, and she picked up a satin ribbon which had been left on his bedside table, a wicked grin spreading across her face. He didn't like where this was going, and just as he suspected, she tied the long ribbon around his eyes, preventing him from seeing her. But he could still feel her moving, and his thoughts went blank when he abruptly realised that she was now taking off her lacy underwear.

"Miku…" her name left his lips like a plea. He hadn't wanted that but he couldn't help it, and he was almost at his breaking point, almost didn't care if he had any ounce of reputation left following this. He wanted her. He wanted to touch her. He wanted to lose himself in her and forget for just a moment his troubles, his worries, his entire life – he just wanted to live out his desires and find out for certain if reality could match his dreams. If reality would be _better_.

"Be patient," she whispered back, and when she climbed back on top of him she was bare, and he wanted to see, but she wouldn't remove that damned ribbon from his face. She was so wet, and it was sweet agony to feel her against him, especially when she began to inch downwards, closer and closer to the part of him which ached for her the most. Her lips met his again and he kissed her desperately, hoping she would relent, hoping she would undo his blindfold, but she remained stubborn. She bit gently on his lower lip and sat back up, and a moment later he felt her taking him inside her, so soft and warm and _unbelievably_ tight.

She was no virgin, and neither was he, but it was the first time he was with her like this, and that was the only thing that mattered. "Len," she gasped, voice breathless, and that made his groin twitch, "you're – you feel really good, I didn't imagine…oh!" she squirmed, and he let out a groan. She felt so good. "You really are full of surprises, aren't you?" she asked.

He didn't answer. Instead, he tried to control his breathing, hoping that she would move again, but she didn't, instead relishing the feeling of him inside her. It was like the sweetest, most painful torture, and he tried to thrust upwards into her, arching his back. She yelped, and he felt her slender hands on his shoulders, forcing him to remain still. "Now that's just cheating," she chided him, and he was on the verge of exploding at her. She was the one who was having all the fun while he suffered here at her hands. It wasn't fair at all.

"Could you _please_ at least take off this blindfold?" he gave in and begged, and he heard a soft chuckle – a moment later, the ribbon came undone and he narrowed his eyes against the sudden light. His vision quickly adjusted, and the next thing he saw was Miku on top of him, her green eyes closed, the satin ribbon wrapped around her wrists. "Please move," he added, hoping that begging again would get him another wish fulfilled. She ignored this one.

"I'll do what I want," she giggled, wriggling her hips again, and he moaned _again_ , the sound reverberating through his bedroom. She kissed him lightly, then she slowly began to ride him, her movements strong and sure, and it took everything he had not to just buck his hips up into her and strain against the bloody handcuffs. He didn't think that his first time with Miku – honestly, he didn't think there'd _ever_ be any time with Miku – would have gone this way, with the blindfolds and the handcuffs and the almost non-consensual sex. It was borderline rape, and he wasn't even enjoying it all that much because it felt like torture.

He was determined not to come before her because he had already lost most of his pride, and the very least he could do was to not let go – but then she started to moan his name and move a little faster, and that was his undoing. He couldn't tolerate it anymore, and when he came, it was with great reluctance and a sense of hollowness – how could he have orgasmed and still feel so unsatisfied, so unhappy? Miku continued to ride him out until she gasped and trembled, and despite feeling gravely wronged he still loved her enough to _feel_ her orgasm, to close his eyes and let her cries of pleasure carry him away.

It wasn't fair. She wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that she had enjoyed this so much and the only thing he got out of it was a hollow feeling of emptiness, because he hadn't gotten what he wanted. She closed her eyes for a while, leaning against his chest, and he just stared blankly up at the ceiling, wondering if he would be able to sleep well tonight. A few moments later, she reached up and thankfully undid his handcuffs, and the very next moment he had them flipped over so that she was trapped beneath him, her green eyes filled with genuine surprise.

"What, did you think that was enough to tire me?" he told her harshly, catching her gaze. "Maybe it would be if I had been _satisfied_ , but now I'm just irritated. You really are the bitchiest, most selfish girl I've ever seen," he ranted, but she didn't get upset, instead just grinning up at him with that familiar sparkle in her eyes, and he knew that _she_ knew he didn't mean what he said. "Fuck," he whispered, before he leant down and pressed his lips to her neck, his hands now moving across her body, taking time to explore what he previously could not.

Her mewls and whimpers were doubly satisfying after all the waiting he was forced to do. She moaned his name, and he relished it, hearing her say _Len_ over and over again while his tongue and his lips traced circles over her sensitive skin. He liked to think he was mature enough to not call this revenge, but deep down it really was revenge, him taking revenge on her for treating him that way earlier. "Don't ever torture me again," he parted from her, his words a warning.

"And what if I do?" she asked in exchange, voice breathless, but her tone still merry. She was goading him, because she knew he wouldn't do anything to hurt her or upset her, not really. He paused. What _would_ he do? And why were they already talking like there would be a second round? He didn't know – he wasn't even _sure_ if he wanted a repeat…

Though if he had to be absolutely truthful, then yes, he definitely did. "Then I'll kick you out of my house since you're not paying me rent," he finally answered, though they both knew he didn't mean it. Where else would she go, anyway? To live with Rei? Uh, sure as hell not. Len would flip if she did that, even before the sex took place. Miku pretended to consider.

"Paying you with sex isn't enough?" she asked, fake innocence dripping from every word she said. Len spluttered, averting his face so that she wouldn't see his flustered expression, and she laughed, amused by his reaction to her words. "I really like you, Len," she continued, and he was surprised to hear the ring of sincerity in her voice. "You're the only one who doesn't take my crap, so I respect you a lot for that. And no one else cares about me the way you do."

The last sentence was said with just the slightest tinge of sadness, and he knew right away that she was referring to her family, with her absent mother and her imprisoned father. Miku never had the happy childhood he had, and maybe that was one reason why he paid her so much attention in the past, why that attention gradually turned into infatuation, and then into something more. "I love you," the words tumbled out before his brain could process them, and he stiffened, suddenly terrified of the repercussions of what he just said.

But she just smiled, the sadness gone from her face. "I love you too," she answered, the words coming out as easily as breathing. But those four simple words took _his_ breath away. He leant down to kiss her again, and she accepted the kiss readily, her arms looping once more around his neck, sighing blissfully into his mouth. Len thought he might be able to get used to this.

Perhaps letting Miku stay in his apartment two weeks ago hadn't been such a bad idea after all.

* * *

 **A/N:** _I really just needed to get that out of my system. Since this entire story was in Len's point of view, maybe I'll do Miku's point of view next time._


	2. Chapter 2

"Wait, so right now you're staying at Len's place?" Rei blinked, his golden eyes filled with surprise. Miku nodded, taking a sip through her straw. Her vanilla milkshake was a welcome respite from the heat outside. It was a ridiculously hot day today.

"I didn't even have to blackmail him!" she exclaimed, grinning. Okay, so maybe she did, _just_ a little, when she mentioned she'd go to Rei's apartment if he didn't let her live with him – but then that wasn't really counted, was it? "Now I have free food and free lodging, so it's a great deal for me," she added, stretching in her seat. There were at least three pairs of eyes fixed on her, but she ignored those gazes. It didn't stop her from feeling rather satisfied with herself, however.

Rei sighed. "I wonder how long he'll put up with it," he mused. The raven-haired boy had grown up in the same neighbourhood as Miku and Len. In fact, the three of them were pretty close, and Miku always made sure to seek out Rei whenever she had some time. It was a lot better than she could say for Len, who was so focused on his own work that he hardly even left his apartment. "Please don't give him a hard time, Miku, the last time you pissed him off he wouldn't talk to anyone else for a month," their friend added beseechingly.

She waved away his concerns. "No worries, I know what to do," she told him confidently, clasping her hands together and leaning slightly forward. "Now enough about me – how is Rin doing?" her eyes gleamed, mouth curling up slightly in a knowing smile. Rei just blinked.

"Rin? I think she's fine, she gave me a call yesterday asking how you and Len were doing. She's in town now too actually," he beamed obliviously at her. Miku almost rolled her eyes. If there was one thing that could be said about Kagene Rei, it was that he was ridiculously _dense_. It was so obvious that Len's cousin was attracted to the boy, but he had zero idea.

"Is she staying at your place?" she asked – if she knew Rin, the blonde probably would have asked Rei if she could crash there while she was in town. Rei nodded innocently, and Miku felt a sly grin appear on her face. Rin was probably as wily as Miku, just that she lacked Miku's guts. Rei opening his apartment to Rin would be the furthest the blonde was willing to push. While Miku, on the other hand, had much more in store than simply being Len's new flatmate.

"You're not going to head back to his flat? It's getting pretty late already," Rei added, glancing at his watch. Miku shook her head – she wanted to catch up with Rin too, so in fact she was right now thinking of dropping by Rei's apartment as well. He made a face when she told him her new plans, but didn't protest. "I'll be worried if you leave my place at this timing, though. Maybe you could just stay the night – you can take my room, and I'll sleep on the couch," he declared.

She nodded happily, making a silent promise to herself to swap accommodations with Rin later while Rei was asleep. She knew that the blonde would want Rei's room much more than Miku did.

* * *

"Uh…I don't know, Miku. I know I'm his cousin and everything, but even I sometimes think that Len might be asexual," Rin shrugged, sitting cross-legged on the bed. Miku snorted.

"Trust me, he isn't," she thought back to the look of surprise on his face the other day when he saw her walking out of her room in a thin white tank and her pyjama shorts. She had not missed the way he averted his face, the slight tinge of red which spread across his cheeks. Given how Len could more or less ignore girls wearing bikinis whenever Miku dragged him to the beach, she was certain that his reaction to her state of undress indicated something.

Rin just shook her head. Len's cousin was a year younger than the rest of them, and she didn't grow up with them. Instead she lived in a town nearby. The first time Miku ever met Rin was when they were twelve, and Rin was eleven, and Len's extended family gathered to celebrate his twelfth birthday. Miku was fascinated by Rin, who looked so much like her cousin, and the two of them struck up a fast friendship. Though Len often accused Miku of being a terrible influence.

"I wish I could have just a tiny bit of your confidence," the blonde admitted, gazing up at the ceiling. The two girls were now in Rei's room, and Rin was clutching possessively on to Rei's pillow. Miku smiled at the sight, then reached over to tug the pillow out of Rin's grip.

"You just need to stop caring about what others think of you," she told the younger girl. "Or even better, learn how to manipulate them so that _you_ control what they think of you!" she added, fluffing up the pillow and leaning back against it. Rin frowned, clearly not knowing how to do that, and Miku giggled. "All you need is some practice," she promised, "and you'll learn how to have people wrapped around your little finger. Though it's not a very nice thing to do…"

"I can imagine," Rin's gaze flitted up to meet hers. "Why can't you just tell Len how you feel about him? I don't understand – you wouldn't mind confessing your feelings to anyone else, so why is my cousin any different?" she questioned. Miku paused, wondering how to reply.

"Because he isn't a game," she finally admitted. "Because I don't want Len to think that I'm just playing around when it comes to him. Also, because he's so unemotional that what I really want is to see that coldness shatter, just once," she winked mischievously. Luckily Rin didn't seem to understand what Miku meant, a look of confusion appearing on her face. Miku thought about how Rin and Rei were a perfect match, since they were both so oblivious to things.

"Good luck with that then," Rin shrugged, leaning back on her elbow. "I have to go back home tomorrow…otherwise Mum would probably yell her head off," she rolled her blue eyes, and Miku thought wistfully about how her eyes were the exact same shade of vivid cerulean as Len's. But their eyes were so different. Rin's gaze was open and expressive, while her cousin was much less so. Sometimes he reminded her of a robot or something.

"Not going to make a move on Rei?" she wiggled her eyebrows knowingly. Rin turned red and threw a bolster at Miku, which she laughingly avoided, climbing off the bed and running out of the room. She caught her breath in the guest room, still thinking about Len. She was determined to make a move soon, because if she didn't, Len wouldn't do anything either.

She wasn't blind, nor was she stupid. She knew the way he looked at her was different from how he looked at other girls. She had never been unaware of his attraction to her – but how could she make him admit that attraction? The Len she knew would never say anything about liking her, or wanting her. She'd have to find another way to make him give in. But she had a grand plan.

After all, since her commission for her latest artwork was coming in, she could afford to go splurge on some nice lingerie. And Miku was certain that even Len would not be immune to her in lacy underwear. He could be cold, but even _he_ didn't have that much self-restraint.

* * *

Miku yawned, turning over and nuzzling into his side. He didn't react, so she opened her eyes a tiny bit and peeked at the blond boy – he was asleep, his long lashes curling slightly against his cheeks. She sat up, studying his face. He looked so peaceful while at rest.

She reached out, letting her fingers hover over his skin, almost touching. She traced his features through thin air, wondering if he would regret last night. She snorted quietly to herself – if she knew him, and she most definitely did, then yes, he would regret immensely. In fact, she'd be much more surprised if he didn't wake up immediately bemoaning his stupidity. But that was why she was here in his bed – she was here to reassure him that everything was actually okay.

The memory of last night made her smile fondly. Her limbs were still sore, but in a decidedly good way, and she didn't have to look in the mirror to see the light bruises which peppered her neck, evidence of their play last night. The pink handcuffs were still locked around the bedposts, forgotten. She wondered whether she ought to bother removing them, but then decided against it – she was too comfortable where she was right now to do anything.

Miku peered at Len again, wondering if he would awaken soon. He was usually up much earlier than she was, but she guessed he was truly exhausted from their activities. Her gaze slid towards the grocery bag he had dropped on the ground, and she hoped that there was nothing perishable in there because if there was, it was probably inedible by now.

He was such a beautiful, beautiful boy. She couldn't help but marvel – while he knew that he was attractive, it wasn't something he'd keep harping on about. In fact, Len would much rather prefer to be known for his accomplishments than his looks, thank you very much. It was the complete opposite of Miku, who made use of her appearance to charm and beguile. She knew what assets she had, and she shamelessly made full use of them to get her way.

She wanted to kiss him. Carefully, she leant over, tucking some of her stray teal hair behind her ear, then closed her eyes and gently pressed her lips to his. His lips were soft, just a little bit swollen, and she was sure hers looked the same way. Her mouth tingled, too sensitive in the morning, and she withdrew, watching him for any signs of wakefulness. He groaned in his sleep, a quiet sound, before he turned towards her, unconsciously tugging on her wrist.

Smiling, she let him pull her into his embrace, and she thought that she could get used to these mornings. She didn't want to admit it, but she still wasn't sure if Len would allow this to continue after he woke up. Last night he confessed to her that he loved her, but would he remember, and more importantly, would he acknowledge what he said? Or would he claim that she had borderline raped him – because Miku wouldn't deny that the issue of consent here was kind of fuzzy – and that whatever he said in the heat of the moment meant nothing?

It could really go either way, and it was unknowns like these which made her nervous. Miku was usually filled with optimism, some gut instinct that told her everything would turn out well, but with Len it wasn't a risk she was willing to take. She would miss him way too much if he left, though she wouldn't tell him that out loud. She was too proud to admit that she wanted him, that she needed him. When had she started to develop feelings for him?

In the past, no one would have looked at them and thought that they would ever end up together, and it was understandable why. Their relationship was almost caretaker and child – he was the tolerant, sarcastic one who kept her in check, and she was the person who was constantly testing his limits. She fondly remembered the first time she managed to steal his wallet – then the second time, then the third, then the fourth…and on it went.

Miku wasn't sure why Len took such great interest in her personal affairs. Maybe it was because she didn't have much of a family, and he knew it. He'd known it since the day he passed by her front yard and saw her playing alone, house empty, dressed in a dishevelled brown dress with her long hair unkempt and unwashed. He was with his parents at that time, and they were immediately concerned about how lonely she looked, so they stopped outside the gate, called her over and spoke to her. That was how their friendship began.

Her mother was hardly ever around. She had quite a bit of money, but that was because she kept going out with other men and living off them, so she was never at home. Her parents weren't even officially married anyway, and her mother gave Miku to her father when she was just a baby. To cover Miku's living expenses, her mother sent them a hefty allowance every month – that was as far as her maternal love went. While her father was constantly getting thrown into jail due to his strange obsession with bank robberies. Miku had no idea why her father was so interested in heists since they didn't actually _need_ the cash.

Her father taught her how to be a successful pickpocket, and as she got older, her mother began to take more interest in her – possibly because Miku was growing more and more beautiful each day – and she started bringing her out, teaching her the ways of seduction, pinpointing weak men and telling her that she should focus on them, because they were the ones who were most likely to part with their money. And that was Miku's entire upbringing.

It wasn't much of a childhood, but it was how she lived, so she never really felt bad for the things she did. The closest she ever got to feeling parental love and affection was from Len's parents, who treated her like their own daughter, though their son always seemed to be rather sullen about her presence. As she continued reminiscing, Len suddenly let out a quiet moan, his eyelids beginning to flutter. Miku closed her eyes, pretending to be asleep, and she wondered how Len would react when he woke up and saw her beside him.

"Ah…" Len's voice was groggy with sleep. "Miku," he whispered her name, and she felt his fingers lightly brushing her hair away from her face. "I know you're awake," he added, and this time he sounded more like his usual self, his voice flat and full of irony. Miku exhaled and took her time to open her eyes, turning her head up so she could meet his gaze.

"How did you feel about last night? Was it fun? Do you want to do it again? A nice morning quickie?" she winked playfully at him. She knew he was affected by her flirtatiousness, even though he tried not to let it show. He cleared his throat, narrowing his blue eyes at her.

"That is _not_ happening again," he deadpanned. "You came into my room and basically forced me to have sex with you. I don't think it was entirely consensual," he reminded her, but Miku waved his concerns away – she knew he brought it up just for the sake of saying _something_ , because if he really hadn't wanted to continue, he would have pushed her away the very moment she freed him from the handcuffs. She had actually expected him to do that. She did not think he would carry on, complaining about how unsatisfied she made him feel.

Instead of deigning to answer, she leant forward and kissed him again, this time full on the lips. He resisted for a while, his lips pressed firmly together, but she turned her head and peppered his neck with kisses before returning to his mouth. He relaxed a little, and she made a small mewling sound, her tongue flicking out against his mouth. His hands were already slipping around her waist, and when she caught his bottom lip between her teeth and gently tugged, he relented, one hand shifting up to hold the back of her head against him as he poured himself into their kiss, whispering her name like a fervent prayer.

She enjoyed being on top. She enjoyed feeling like she had some control over Len – the one person in the world who seemed so resistant to whatever she did. It wasn't the first time she tried to flirt with him, it wasn't even the first time she decided to chase him. No, ever since they were young teenagers Miku had already decided that Len was the person who was most suited for her, but Len was the one who continuously rejected her advances.

No, not rejected. He never rejected her outright, but he would avoid acknowledging the things she said or did. If some new romance movie came out and her friends said they wanted to see it, she'd playfully turn to Len and joke about him bringing her out on a date, and he'd just shoot her a dead stare and ignore what she said. There were countless other examples she could bring up to illustrate this point, but she couldn't remember them now.

Miku pulled away first, interested in seeing how he would react to her. Len blinked up at her, for a moment seeming almost vulnerable, before those blue eyes narrowed again, back to their usual suspicious, distant look. "Stop doing that to me," he hissed, his hands on her shoulders, holding her up – but she noted that he still didn't try to push her away.

"And what if I want to continue?" she teased, kneeling over him, her teal hair falling into her eyes. He gazed up at her, one hand reaching up to tuck those loose strands behind her ear, an almost unconscious gesture. "What are you going to do, kick me out of your place? I can always just find somewhere else to stay, if you don't care about me being out there alone…"

Len looked annoyed. "Stop using that against me," he grumbled. "And anyway, that's not the main point here. You can't just barge into my room and do whatever you want. I swear I'll lock my room door in the future," he added, and she was a little nervous about that since she couldn't be sure if he was joking or not. With Len, it was difficult to tell sometimes.

"What if I'm dying and I need help? And I can't reach you because you're locked inside your room and you lost the key?" she protested dramatically, falling away and collapsing on the bed beside him. "Then you'll have my _death_ on your conscience. Do you really want that?"

He gave her a droll look. "You have a phone, don't you? And how can I be stuck in my own room when the door locks from the inside?" he pointed out, as rational as ever. She huffed and rolled her eyes, trying to hide the nervousness growing in her stomach. Miku was unused to being the one who had to…well, _persuade_. Usually men were the ones who were asking her to stay. She was never forced into this role before, where she had to convince someone else to let her carry on. She was unused to not being desirable.

"You're no fun, Len," she pouted, turning around to stare at him. Len met her gaze, and he looked as expressionless as ever – but she thought there was just the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face, and her breath caught. That stupid smirk. She had only ever seen Len smirking five times in all the many, many years she knew him, but every time she saw it, it made her heart speed up without fail. The one thing she had realised though, was that he only ever smirked around her. It made her happy to know that no other girl ever saw him this way.

"I'm not paid to be fun. I'm paid to be a teaching assistant," he replied. "Sorry if that rubs off on my personal life – actually no, I'm not sorry for that at all," he sat up, the blanket sliding down his bare chest. Her eyes followed the movement of the white sheet, and she suddenly remembered what he looked like underneath his casual tees and black jeans. Len had the perfect body, at least in her opinion, all lean muscle and hardness. She used to tease him about not working out enough, but after last night, she had to eat her words.

Miku licked her lips, tongue darting out to moisten them, and she noticed how Len glanced at her mouth for just a fleeting second before he hastily looked away. She smiled – so he wasn't as unaffected by her as he pretended to be. "You know, I remember something from last night – I think _someone_ mentioned that they loved me…" she paused, then she winked.

"You probably misheard," Len told her without batting an eyelid. She squinted at him, and Len just stared back, looking remarkably serene. "Last night was pretty messy, if I recall correctly. You could have heard anything," he shrugged, tilting his head and studying her.

Miku wanted to scream in frustration. She settled for sitting up as well, folding her arms defiantly, and Len's gaze dipped momentarily to her chest. That soothed the annoyance just a little bit. "That's not what I recall," she settled for dropping her voice to a murmur, leaning slightly closer and gazing up at him from underneath her eyelashes. If he wasn't affected by _this_ , then she didn't know what else she could do. He blinked, his gaze fixed on her face.

She inched even closer. Len still didn't move. Miku felt like she was cornering a trapped animal, because she was so aware of how tense he was – he seemed like he on the verge of getting up and running away. Carefully, she placed one hand on top of his, and he still remained motionless. She could barely hear him breathing. "Len?" she asked, a single word, her voice tremulous. Her grip on his hand tightened, and she looked up.

His other hand tugged on her hair and suddenly he was kissing her again, the same way he kissed her last night, desperate and needy and so _unlike_ himself – she moaned, unable to prevent the sound from leaving her mouth, as he flipped them over and leant over her, his blond hair barely brushing against her face. His hair was tied up in its usual ponytail, but it was starting to come loose, tendrils framing his face in a way that seemed almost angelic.

Her arms looped themselves around his neck, needing to hold on to something. His back and shoulders were tense. She could feel his warm breath on her skin, and she could smell a hint of mint, mixed with a tiny trace of his cologne from last night. He was the only one whose touch could make her shiver, because no one else really meant much to her. But it wasn't something she wanted to tell him, because she didn't know how he would take that.

He still wasn't completely willing to be with her. But she could slowly, slowly nudge him in that direction. She was aware of his attraction to her, and she could guess why he was so reluctant to vocalise that desire. Not that she didn't understand his fears, but she had been chasing him for so long that it was starting to exhaust her. She had to make a move soon because she was tired of constant rebuffs, of him pretending that he didn't care for her.

Len's free hand slid down her shoulders, pausing at her breasts. His fingers brushed against the tip and she shuddered, her skin still sensitive. He smiled against her mouth. "You know what, maybe I'll admit more things about last night if you're willing to be a good girl and let yourself be punished," he drew back and whispered in her ear, waiting for her response.

She bit her lip, a gesture which was half-practice and half-instinct. He noticed, and his blue eyes darkened just a slight bit, which honestly was the most arousing thing she had ever seen. "How do you intend to punish me?" she asked sweetly. Maybe she could give up her sense of control for once. Just once. Just to see what Len would be like if he was in the lead.

His gaze flicked up towards the handcuffs which were still locked around the bedposts. She groaned. "You can't do that to me," she protested, though deep down she wanted him to chain her up. It wouldn't be fun if she gave in just like that, though. "That's not any fun!"

"Like you cared about that when you did the same thing to _me_ ," he interjected smoothly, yanking her arm up and locking the cuff around her slender wrist. A thrill of anticipation ran through her as she pretended to struggle, Len easily breaking through her weak resistance and snapping both cuffs around her. Her breath caught as he stared down at her, studying her intently, his gaze drifting up from her waist to her face. He looked contemplative.

"I forgot one more thing," he grinned, then reached over to grab the satin ribbon. Miku froze. "It wouldn't feel complete without a blindfold, would it?" he asked. She bit her lip again – now that wasn't part of her plan. He carefully slid the ribbon over her eyes, securing it with a firm knot, and suddenly her world was dark and she couldn't see a single thing. She could still hear him and feel him, and she gasped when she felt his fingers moving down her torso.

Miku wished she could _see_ Len now. She had never seen him like this before – heck, she didn't even think he could behave this way. She assumed that he wasn't the dominant kind in sex, but in hindsight, that was a stupid assumption to make. He was so determined to be the best in everything else – why would sex be any different? She swallowed. When his hands gently squeezed her breasts, she jerked, unable to stop herself from reacting.

He laughed at her instinctive response, the sound low and throaty. It was the hottest thing she had ever heard, and she could feel herself becoming aroused, clamping her thighs tightly together because she didn't want him to notice. It was too soon to get wet, and it felt like admitting defeat in some way if he found out how much his touch affected her. It was the blindfold. And the handcuffs. She liked being tied up – it was one of her many, many kinks.

"I want to hear you say my name," he whispered. "Because if we're going to sleep together, then I want it to be on _my_ terms," his fingers were suddenly replaced by his tongue and his name tore its way past her lips, a breathless gasp. It felt so good – _he_ felt so good. He was warm and skilled and so gentle that she could cry. It was a side of him she knew no one had ever seen before. People only ever saw his stoicism, his general lack of emotion. They only saw his rational side, his impeccable logic, the way he reined in desire as though it was nothing of particular significance to him. Miku _knew_ she was the only one who had seen him this way.

Though he sometimes acted like he couldn't stand the sight of her, she'd always known that he hid his feelings. She noticed because Len always seemed most unhappy when she went out with someone else, and while he tried to disguise it as gruff concern for her well-being, he could never quite hide the flash of irritation that went through his sharp eyes whenever he spotted her out with her dates. Which was actually one reason why she stopped dating.

When he asked her about that, she just casually said she didn't have time or the desire for a relationship, and the relief he experienced at her simple statement was almost palpable. He still tried to disguise it, saying that he was glad she was thinking things through, but Miku was aware that if it had been any other girl, he wouldn't have cared. Again, she wasn't oblivious. She put two and two together, and that was when she started thinking about whether she should seriously start pursuing Len, because up till that point it had always been a running gag between them. She really did…she did want him.

"If I'm such an inconvenience," she gasped out when Len's mouth moved from her chest to the most sensitive part of her throat, where the curve of her neck turned into her shoulder, "then why don't you want me to move out and stay with someone else? Rei…he wouldn't mind," her breath hitched as Len bit into her skin. It hurt, but definitely in a good way.

It took a while before he answered, and when he parted from her he did so reluctantly. "I know you wouldn't be able to stop yourself from stealing his things. I was looking out for his welfare, not yours," he answered, voice smooth and steady. He didn't seem breathless at all, unlike her – she knew she was becoming a complete mess. Not that she cared.

"Oh, but again, Rei wouldn't mind," she pointed out, a grin curling her lips. It was the truth, they both knew that – Rei was just as aware of Miku's thieving habit as Len was, and he was actually the more tolerant of the two, usually allowing her to get away with it as long as she didn't spend too much of his cash. Instead of replying, she suddenly felt his lips on hers.

She moaned as he tugged on her bottom lip with his teeth, and there was something about his kiss that seemed almost angry. Maybe because for once, he didn't know how to retort. If this was his way of shutting her up, she didn't mind. Her toes curled as her already sensitive mouth tingled, a silent protest. It was too early for this kind of rough play, but she was fond of pushing herself and testing her limits. Would Len be the one who managed to break her?

"You are the most _annoying_ woman I've ever met," he sounded like he was trying to catch his breath. Miku's chest was heaving as well. That kiss had been particularly intense. "If you keep asking all these questions I won't be able to concentrate," he snapped. Miku rolled her eyes, though he couldn't see it underneath the blindfold. What concentration did he need?

"I don't know what you're talking about. It's _sex_ – you don't need concentration. Don't be ridiculous," she exhaled. "And stop avoiding the question. Why don't you want me to move out of your house if I'm such a pest?" she reminded him, not willing to let him get away without answering. Len's hands gripped her shoulders, his fingers tight against her skin.

"And I won't answer that because I'm not obliged to," his whisper was loud in her ear, and she jumped, startled by how close his voice suddenly was. "You don't always answer my questions either. And don't say that I'm lying," he added before she could protest, "how many times have I asked you where you were, and all you did was evade the question?"

She flushed. Most of the time, when she didn't answer his questions, she avoided them because she knew he'd lose his mind. How was she supposed to explain that she was out with some rich guy, intending to steal his wallet and slip away before he took her to some shady hotel? First of all, Len would disapprove of her petty theft – she swore that she only did it nowadays to support herself when she was truly, desperately broke, but he still wouldn't be okay with it. And secondly…her being with a guy would set him off.

Len stared down at Miku, whose fair cheeks were turning pink. With embarrassment? With shame? Or maybe just lust? He couldn't really tell, not with her – though he knew her well, he was always second-guessing himself when it came to Miku. He didn't know what he was doing, he didn't know what he _should_ do. What had he gotten himself into this time?

He should have just left the room when he had the option to. But she came to him with those soft, wide eyes – again, probably rehearsed, but how could he resist that sight? – and her slender hand on his and suddenly, he forgot who he was and the things he told himself after everything they did last night. Suddenly, the only thing he wanted was to hold her, to touch her, to keep her in his bed with him. He didn't want her to leave.

It was stupid. She had spent the whole night in his room, sleeping beside him. He ought to be desperate to kick her out, but when he saw her face in the morning, lying peacefully next to him…he couldn't. He had already decided to forget about admitting his feelings for her – that was a bad memory, and he would pretend it never happened – but she said that she loved him too…he hesitated. It could be real, but it could also be a lie, and that was the frightening part, the fact that he did not know for sure what was the truth. _How annoying_.

He was torn between leaving her here and finishing what he started. Len couldn't deny that seeing Miku chained to his bed, a satin ribbon tied around her eyes, her lips parted invitingly with that rosy blush on her face…it was the most alluring sight he had ever seen. And if he wasn't Kagamine Len, if he had been anyone else who was less egoistic, he would have just given in and kissed her and stayed here the rest of the morning. But he _wasn't_ anyone else.

It was stupid and he knew it was extremely wrong, but he wanted her. No matter how much his mind yelled at him to leave her the hell alone, he just instinctively wanted her, yearned for her – especially after last night, after finding out what she felt like wrapped around him, her taste in his mouth, moaning his name in her sweet voice. After last night, something in him had given way, and he knew he couldn't go back to what he was like _before_. It would be like asking him to wipe away an entire chunk of his memory. How could he just pretend that nothing happened between them when he had lived out most of his sexual fantasies?

Things would have been so much easier if he never developed feelings for anyone at all. And even if he did, it could have been anyone else. Why did it have to be the one girl in his life who frustrated him to no end, whom he dearly wished he could have nothing to do with? She was deliciously inviting. She was everything he wanted in one soft, tender package, her fingers winding through his hair and her green eyes reflecting his image. Miku was the girl he wanted and the girl he _didn't_ want. He still couldn't bring himself to admit his feelings for her. Last night had definitely been a huge mistake. And yet, here he stayed.

He thought she tasted like strawberries. Not honey, it was too thick and viscous. The light, refreshing sweetness of strawberries. It matched her plump lips and their natural pinkish hue. There was an _I love you_ on the very tip of his tongue, but he swallowed it. That had slipped out last night; he wouldn't say the same thing again. And if she brought it up, he would continue to pretend that nothing happened. It was all in the heat of the moment.

"Can I…" he swallowed. Her head turned in the direction of his voice. She cocked her head, waiting for him to continue. He didn't say anything else. Instead, he slipped his hand between her legs, gently parting them for him, and she obliged willingly – when he slid his fingers up her thighs, she whimpered softly, and he thought he heard his name again. Another swallow. She was so sleek and wet, and his mind suddenly went blank. She wanted him. Her words could lie, her eyes could beguile, but her body couldn't trick him. _Miku_ wanted his touch.

She still couldn't see, but his slow hands trailing along her bare skin was torture. She could feel but she didn't know what his next move would be, what else he intended to do to her. She could guess that he wasn't about to ditch her, but she was painfully curious about what he would do next. And then she felt his mouth against her, and she whimpered.

His fingers were gripping her thighs, preventing them from closing. If her hands had been free, she would have weaved her fingers through his hair, clutching the blond locks so tightly that her knuckles turned white, but as it were, all she could do was moan and hope that his movements wouldn't drive her insane. He was incredibly soft and gentle. She didn't think he would be so tender – after what happened last night, she had expected him to be rough and angry, but he _wasn't_. He hummed softly, and she felt the vibrations shoot right up her body, making her jump. She gnawed on her lip, so desperate it hurt.

Abruptly, he stopped, and she felt his lips leave her. She whimpered, a faint sound filled with disappointment. "Answer me just one thing, Miku," his words were quiet. She couldn't really tell what sort of emotions he was experiencing, not without being able to see his face – but she knew he was feeling _something_. It was there, barely present in his voice. "Last night, you told me that you loved me. Is that really true, or is it all just part of your game?"

She hesitated, still breathing heavily. She didn't know how to answer. What she said was true, but she wasn't certain if she wanted to tell him that. It felt like she would lose her sense of control over the situation if she admitted it to him. She always wanted to be in control. She was terrified of not having the upper hand, because from young she was told that to succeed, she _had_ to have power. She couldn't rely on anyone else because the world was cruel and she couldn't trust anyone to always be there for her. She had to fend for herself, and she did so by wearing masks, layer over layer over layer, to protect her heart.

"I told you it wasn't a game," she finally answered. She hoped that was enough to satisfy him, but suddenly the blindfold came loose and she blinked, looking up at Len. He was staring at her intently, his blue eyes searching hers, and there was something in his gaze that made her think that she couldn't lie. That she shouldn't. Not this time, and not to him.

"That's not what I asked," he whispered. "It's a simple question, with a simple answer. Do you really love me?" he left it at that, the words hanging between them, an unspoken plea. She could _hear_ the plea in his voice, and she knew he was on the verge of begging. But she didn't feel satisfied at the thought of that. Her heart twisted, afraid of what might happen.

The longer she hesitated, the more he seemed to withdraw. Something fell over his blue eyes, his gaze becoming less open, more guarded like how it usually was. He turned his head a little, looking away from her, and she found hasty words suddenly hurling themselves out of her mouth. "I do. I do love you, and it was never just a game to me," she told him, and she sounded so earnest that it was a surprise, even to herself. His head shot back to her.

He looked almost hopeful. "It's not a game?" he echoed. She nodded, watching him, and he leant closer to her, slightly dazed. His gaze softened. "You don't know what you're doing to me," it was such a quiet murmur that he was barely audible. She had to strain her ears to catch what he said. When he kissed her, it felt different – he was hesitant this time, with none of the raw ferocity that was present in their earlier kisses, but he was also searching and questioning and there was something unspeakably tender about the way his mouth moved against hers. She met his lips, closing her eyes, and moments later she felt her wrists fall loose from the bedposts. He had unlocked her handcuffs, much to her relief.

When he entered her this time, it was slow and loving, and he held himself over her, his blue eyes never leaving her as he moved, causing her to gasp and bite her lip. "I want you to watch me," it sounded like a command, and she did as he said, her eyes never leaving his. Len thought he had never witnessed anything more sublime. Her teal hair was spread out over his pillows, forming a halo around her face, and she watched him, her green eyes a mixture of desire and innocence. For once, he didn't think that innocence was faked.

He wouldn't tell her that he loved her. He still couldn't, not when it was so new, not when he still couldn't believe it fully. But he did. He wouldn't deny it to himself. Her long limbs were wrapped around him and she felt so _good_ , so soft and warm and he just wanted to melt into her and have her hold him forever. It wasn't a game, it wasn't some kind of power play, not like what they had before. This time was slow and sensuous and _loving_ and the only thing he wanted was to see her close her eyes and whisper his name in his ear.

She did something better. "I love you," she murmured, her arms tightening around his neck right before she shuddered, the waves cresting beautifully through her body – she came before him this time, and he forced himself to push through her cries of pleasure, lasting just a few moments more before his own release. Then he continued to stay there for a while longer as he struggled to breathe, trying to recover from what just happened.

They had sex again. But it was very different this time. And he was less sure about whether he regretted this decision or not. Miku's limbs trembled. He pressed his lips to her cheek, mind still blank from satisfaction. He was finding it difficult to not just pull her to him and hold her in his arms, burying his face in her hair. No, he was still too proud to do that.

Her hand cupped his cheek, and he blinked. "I can leave you alone now if you want," her voice was a breathy whisper, the most understanding thing she had said to him in a long while. But he didn't want her to go. He seized her hand, holding it to his cheek, and she watched him, her expression startled. "Len?" she asked, voice shaking a little. He exhaled.

Suddenly he could breathe. "No. Don't leave," it sounded more like a plea than an order, but she didn't comment. She just nodded, her gaze so understanding. His grip on her hand tightened, then he let go and sank into the bed, resting beside her. She curled up against his chest, leaning her head against his shoulder. His arms wrapped around her. He was still unsure, still confused. But he knew that he didn't want her to just leave him here alone.

"I didn't want you to stay with Rei because I knew I'd get jealous, even though I knew Rei wouldn't do anything to you," he finally mumbled, addressing the question she asked him earlier. She laughed, a merry sound, and he relaxed – this was more like how things usually were. He'd say something, she would tease him, and life went on as per normal. Though he couldn't forget that look of vulnerability on her face when she told him that she loved him.

"Is that a confession then?" she asked teasingly, tilting her head up to meet his gaze. Her green eyes were mischievous as always, and that emotional side of her – the real Miku who lay beneath all those masks she wore – was hidden once again, but he had seen _her_. He had seen the girl who hid herself from everyone, afraid of being hurt, afraid that she would be left behind if she didn't take the lead, running away from everyone else. He had seen her and he wouldn't let her go. She could be annoying, but…but he loved her anyway.

"No," he told her firmly. Miku just laughed again and kissed him lightly on the cheek, and he closed his eyes. It was a weekend. He could sleep in for a while longer. And Miku's lips curved into a gentle smile, knowing that this was the closest Len would ever come to telling her that he loved her. It would take a while, but she'd accept his unsaid words – and maybe one day, they would be able to talk about their feelings without both wanting to run away.


End file.
